I get my daughter every other weekend. She’s 9 years old and her mother bought her a cell phone, obviously to keep tabs on my daughter.
This weekend, we were watching a movie when I got a text from my ex wife asking to speak to my daughter.
Now, I don’t attach myself to my phone (unless I’m working) and I got the text about 30 minutes after it came through.
When I saw it, I told my daughter that her mom wants to speak to her and I also texted my ex, saying that we were watching a movie but that I told our daughter that she wants to talk.
The movie ended around 9:10 pm and I had my daughter go shower/brush teeth/ go to bed. I told her I’d be up to tuck her in.
I went into my daughters room at about 9:40 and she was on the phone with her mother.
He mother was SCREAMING into the phone “YOU TELL HIM FUCK YOU! YOU CAN SAY THAT! I SAY ITS OK FOR YOU TO TELL YOUR FATHER FUCK YOU!!”
I took the phone from my daughter and I said to my ex wife that she was acting very inappropriately and that if she has a problem with me she should bring it up with me, not our daughter.
She yelled at me about not allowing our daughter to use her phone, which isn’t true at all.
I asked her to calm down and to keep in mind the effect her words are having on our daughter. My ex was furious and was breathing heavily, obviously biting her tongue.
I handed the phone back to my daughter, and said loudly enough for my ex wife to hear “daddy is going to leave the room now, please don’t stay on the phone long, it’s way past your bedtime.” (Bed time is usually 9:00 but the movie ran over a tiny bit and it was Saturday night so I bent the bedtime a bit).
I had to get my stepson to bed (he’s a little bit older, so he can stay up a little longer).
I walked by my daughters room maybe 10/15 minutes later and she’s repeating “I’m sorry” into the phone. I fought my instinct to take that phone away because of the torment my daughter was experiencing.
I walked downstairs to do some chores and distract myself from my anger.
It wasn’t until 10:50 that my daughter came downstairs. She had obviously been crying and was exhausted.
I sat with her in her room, prayed with her, and tried to talk to her about what happened. She was really upset and wouldn’t speak much. I hugged her. My daughter told me there was 11 missed calls from her mother and that her mother said she was just worried about her.
I’m sick of my limited time with my daughter being questioned. Divorce is hard enough on children, and I think my exwife is making it a lot harder on my daughter than it needs to be.
What can I do?
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