I cannot tell you how much of a turn off it is when you step inside someone’s home for the first time and it is a mess. This might be more acceptable for college aged daters, but as a 29F in the dating world I can say that stepping into a 35yr person’s apartment with clutter EVERYWHERE, dirty dishes, an unmade bed, the stale stench of an unkept dog and not even a guesstimate to when the last time their place didn’t look like this - is cause for an immediate NOPEing the fuck out of there.
Even if you aren’t planning on bringing her/him home after the date, what if the date goes really well and you end up at your place anyway?
Think of it like condoms: having them available doesn’t mean you planned for sex, but wouldn’t you rather be prepared to go if things got hot and heavy? Don’t get caught with your pants down people!
And just in case you aren’t convinced: I was on the fence about a guy I had been on 2 dates with. We ended up back at his place to pick up his dog for a walk, but after walking into that Stale-Smelling Cave of Clutter, I knew which side of the fence I was on. Had his place been cleaned and bright and looked like a grown ups? Maybe there’d be a third date, I guess we’ll never know.
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